Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Three Tips to Get Back Up When Life Knocks You Down

Things don't always "come up roses."
Today has been a rough day Chez Green. Something happened that took the wind clean out of my sails. Nothing earth-shattering, just an unexpected hassle that I thought I had taken steps to avoid. In the past few days, I've had other frustrations that I managed well. But this one popped the balloon, broke the camel's back, crushed my spirit for the day. It made all the other problems zoom back into focus, and now I find myself literally stooped, finding it hard to lift my head.

My dear husband tried to help.
"This problem isn't a big deal."
"It's going to be ok.."
"You can't let something minor like this tear you up."

But for whatever reason, being caught off guard has me smacked down today. I've moped and groused and cried and fumed, and now I'm ready to learn. Just how do you fight a disappointment--whether severe or severely minor?

  1. Accept where you are. This one is hard for me. I don't like to admit I'm in "a wee bit o' a snit," even more so if my problems are for something I could have prevented. And I'm often afraid of seeing how bad a problem is, so I try to ignore it and hope it goes away. But, as this article on acceptance points out, you can't deal with something you can't accept. Most problems are not as bad as you imagine them to be.
  2. Look for inspiration. I went to QuoteGarden.com, and searched "disappointment," which led me to "inspirational adversity quotes."  There I found lots of good advice, everything from "birds sing after a storm; why shouldn't people feel as free to delight in whatever remains to them?" (Rose Kennedy) to "If you want to forget all your other troubles, wear too tight shoes."  (The Houghton Line, November 1965). After reading the page, I sat up a little straighter and felt a bit more resilient. You can also call a friend or mentor, or go over your successes in your mind.
  3. Look to your beliefs. Do you believe you'll be rewarded in some way for doing the right thing? Do you believe you have a mission to complete? Do you believe your attitude affects your reality? Then live like you believe. If you know negativity is an issue for you, and want to change, then the best time to start is in a negative state. Find an uplifting sentence to repeat, or a verse of poetry to write out. I sat down to write this blog, knowing I don't really believe the day/week/month is wasted because of one disappointment. 
I hope these points help you in your own fight against disappointment. If so, please share or comment!

Photo credit: Teresa Y Green

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